BORED SHITLESS

Have you ever been so damn bored that you wanted to gouge your own eyes out, eat them, and the shit back out onto a plate? Thats how fuckin bored I am right now. AND I'M AT WORK!!! These same damn numbers, analysis, experiments, and all this shit is really running together right now. I need a vacay horribly. I told Mica I was bored and she suggested I write a blog. No shit, Mica. Has anyone noticed that my blogs have alot about Mica in 'em? I shoulda titled this bitch "the Mica monologues - by Kisses". Oh ok maybe not, but she is the only reason I started this damn blog. Thanks for the shout outs to my blog Mica.

You know who pisses me off? Forta Whitaker. I CANNOT stand his eye.

I recently watched "Vantage Point" and although it was a pretty good movie, him and THAT EYE bothered the shit outta me. I just couldn't stop looking at it. I was like how in the hell is peering into that camera? Can he see what's on the other end?? Oh, y'all, me and Forta ain't gon make it. Looking at his eye makes me realize why the servant in "Tell-Tale Heart" killed the old man. (By the way, that is a story by Edgar Allan Poe) In this short story, (very short) this servant kills his master, an old man, just because the man had a bad eye. It said that it was just too annoying and that it peered into his soul. Well, Forta's eye don't do all that to me, but it does bug the shit outta me. I just wanna buy him an eye patch. *shivers*

And have y'all seen his beautiful ass wife? Ain't no way in hell she married this Negro because she just fell in love with him! I need to know the background on this meeting because it looks like beauty and the beast again. Beauty is poor and down on her luck. Beast is powerful with lots of money. Beauty says, "Fuck it, I rather sleep with as beast than have a hungry wallet."Beast is excited that he has met Beauty, because he knows deep down inside that if he wasn't rich - he wouldn't even get to smell the punanny on Beauty!! So it all works out!! Another classic Donald Trump and Melania Knauss case!!!!

And in the midst of trying to write this damn blog, I was trying to post a pic of Forta and his wife, and dumb ass blogspot won't allow me too. FUCKERS!!!! *beats head on desk* Ooo, it is NOT my day!!! I'm bored as hell, I hate my hair, I have to wash clothes, I'm still trying to sell this damn shih tzu I have, and then blogpsot is acting a DAMN FOOL!!! Fuck Forta. *faints* I can't go on....

Well on a lighter note, Hurricane Gustav is scheduled to hit on my birthday! That's right. The Hurricane that will devastate my fellow Americans is going to tear some shit up all in honor of me. I told y'all I was gonna bump like this! But hopefully, it doesn't bring too much rain on Saturday night, because I am hitting up a night spot. Me, Pierre, T.Nook and her choice drunken crew will all be in the place to be.

Why do people say "the place to be"? The place to be is always somewhere where you have to spend all ya damn money and look real good to impress people who don't give a shit about you anyways. LMAO. Man - the place to be was getting those FEMA checks 3 years ago when Katrina hit. The place to be was waiting in front of yo damn mailbox when those stimulus checks came through. The place to be is the damn bank once your direct deposit hits. Whew! Now those were "the place to be". Not sweating ya weave out, trying to pose cute at a club, waiting for alltheparties.com to take your tired ass picture, so you can run and post it on facebook that night to look like you have a life. LMAOOO - I ain't hatin. Y'all know I would be posing in them pics too if I went to the club. LOL

Don't you hate when people do that? Hate on you for something you're doing - when you know they would totally do it? LOL and I hate when people go around talking about who has a life and who doesn't. And I'm thinking to myself - People with lives have no idea who doesn't have a life because they don't give a shit enough to find out!!!

Well, I'm signing off. I'm sick of typing for today. I feel like I'm getting carpel tunnel.

Girl, where is Blog #2?

LOL! So Mica called me out and asked where my next blog was. I KNEW I would need help keeping up with this! Argghh!!! ButI have been having a few issues on my mind, and after watching Michelle Obama's speech today on Youtube.com - I'm ready to blog again.

I am extremely excited that I decided to let go and let God within the past few days. I had been letting an issue get to me that wouldn't normally bother me. I have some friends who I feel try to play catch up with me, or "keeping up with the Joneses", is the phrase Im so used to hearing coined. But if I rent a nice apartment in a nice area, they have to go and rent one in a nicer area thats more expensive. If I say I'm looking at a certain type of vechicle, then all of a sudden they are buying that vechicle. If I say I want to go somewhere, then all of a sudden they are going there on vacation. If I say I want certain jewelry, then they are going to buy that jewelry. If I'm going to school, they are signing up for school. On and On and On and On - you get the point. They copy and try to outdo every aspect of my life - and I was letting it get to me. I was constantly complaining about them, I was allowing myself to begin to hate them. I even got to the point where I didn't want to see them because I knew they were going to mention some big plans they have (that never come through). But in the last few days, I came out of that cloud. I thought to myself, if they follow me, all they can do is go up. I consider myself to be pretty successful, and maybe they copy me because they want my secret to success and happiness. LMAO - I know I'm fooling myself. They copy because they don't have their own identities, they are insecure about their current place in life, and putting themselves above others makes them feel good - at that moment. But now I'm over it, and I just feel sorry that they feel the need to compete with a friend. So, I have returned back to not letting it affect me, and I wish them the best of luck!!!

In more recent news, I have decided to paint my little apartment I call home. I would love to do some greens, tans, and browns. I think that would be very relaxing. My color scheme is the same throughout the entire apartment, so I should be safe sticking with a variation of the same colors. Mica came with me to the paint store, and got pissed at me because I wanted to pick colors, mix paint, and paint the entire apartment all in one night. LOL - man she was hella annoyed with me. But, shoots, I didn't know you couldn't do it all in one night! I thought we would grab some tan off of the shelf, and go home and slap it on the wall. Shittttttt......Anyway, so I'm in the process of picking out paint colors and patiently waiting to paint. (and I'm trying so hard not to just paint! Because if I do, it will look like crap, I will cry, and Mica will shake her head and make that loud noise with her mouth - and I hate chain reactions) SOOOOO the painting is on the back burner for now.

Last night Mica and I decided it would be cool to have an "African American L Word", and I want her to help me write it. But I know she won't until she thinks I'm serious, and I can't even blog on time, lol. But Pierre and I actually went through and made some story lines, and character descriptions, and thought of some more people to play in the "series". So once I have it all written and pretty, I can present my product to my co-writer. Then she can begin drumming up ideas and helping me to write a script!

This is it for Blog #2, and I'm out. I really gotta work on organizing these damn things so they won't be all over the place. So, thanks peeps and I'm out.

I LOVE writing like I have a damn audience. LMAO - it's hilarious!!!! Thanks people!!!

Mica says I won't!

So this is my first day on Blogspot. I was inspired to create this page by Tamica Nicole, the author of the blogs at http://shew0rdhustlez.blogspot.com. If you haven't done so already, be sure and check her blogs out. They are always insighful, sarcastic, or downright hilarious. She's great, she's perfect, her blogs totally rock....blah blah blah....enough about her. Back to me..... (You know it's nothing but love T.Nook "the mf'in crook!!)

So Mica says she's doesn't know why I created this page because she knows I won't write blogs. Well, this is my challenge. - To write a damn blog. I mean, I can talk with the best of them. I can argue, ponder, and converse on a subject for hours. My biggest problem is shutting the fuck up long enough to write it down. As a matter of fact, I'm about ready to burst into verbal slurs right now. But I have comfortably nuzzled my mouth shut with the tape from my desk - just so I could get out this first, lame, waste of space blog. And when my co-workers ask me why my mouth is taped shut, I will politely tell them it's because I'm practicing for when I will be nuzzled into submission tonight by my dominatrix. I have a knack for getting people to stay the hell out of my business.

I'm going to need help with this people. I will need encouragment, because I am determined to blog. It has brought such peace to others - and hell to some, but I want to see what it will bring to me. For years Oprah has said that writting in a journal is a very healthy way of self-expression, and Martha Stewart will even teach you how to make one out of fig leaves and orange slices. And since Oprah and Martha Stewart are like God and Emmanuel to the modern, middle-aged Caucasian housewife, I'm going to try journaling. Only, I'm going to do it online, and join all the other attention starved, myspacing, suidical, alcholic before I'm 21, teenagers. This should be fun. Getting to read what people think, looking at pictures of people's journey's, getting angry and blowing up at people's opinions who live oodles of miles away...yep. Count me in Blogspot! I aspire to be a blogger! Post my picture on the wall right next to Tamica Nicole - the only person to successfully post 100 blogs in under 3 months!! I told you all, this girl is a beast! She is totally dedicated! Or maybe it's because her job allows her to sit online all day.... *gulps* Well whatever the case may be - whether it's dedication or a relaxed job - she's on it. As will I be. This is my first one ---- and when I get to 100, I can say I told you so!

I told you so!!

Welp...I guess I have to get to 100 first. Ha! Love you Mica, and it's on dammit!!!!

Damn ripping off that tape kinda hurt...